Sunday, October 23, 2016

My first love; the relationship to pursue

I know, it's very predictable. You are probably not going to talk about your first boyfriend and the relationship to pursue is one with Jesus.

'Isn't that what this post is about?' you may think. Yes, it is.
'I'm already a Christian. Just get on with the other topics already.' Wait, hang in there!
or you may think 'Just a minute, but I'm not even a Christian. How is this even applicable? I was just here for the relationship part.' And you're gonna get the relationship part.

Before you skim through this post and close your tab, may I convince you otherwise?

This is the first post I'll start my series with because it holds an importance to the other posts that will follow.

Taking it all the way back to the beginning, Genesis 1:26-27:

26 Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth." 27 So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.

 From the beginning, God had an incredible plan for relationships. I believe that it is out of a longing to have a relationship with us that God created human beings.

*Side note: Interestingly, I've always only thought that God created Adam, then after awhile He created Eve. While that remains true, I didn't know that Genesis 1:26-27 was a prior thought of creation/design before the actual making. In the passage above, it seems to me that God had a plan to create both men and women; and He did, but (in my opinion) He did not make their bodies but formed their identity. I can't be accurate about what kind of form God created in chapter 1, but probably their inward parts - in terms of soul or spirit. (As the making of their bodies seems to be in Genesis 2).

Genesis 2: 7-8:

And the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living being.

The Lord God planted a garden eastward in Eden, and there He put the man whom He had formed.

I'm not sure about you, but reading Genesis 1 and 2 has been mind-blowing for me! Firstly, I re-discovered God's plan of forming both men and women in His image. 

1. God wants a relationship with us.

The very fact that God created us to enjoy life and live with Him is #relationshipgoals. That was the ultimate plan from the beginning! This is so important to note and understand, because until we find our identity in our creator, we will keep seeking for our identity in something and someone else. The first relationship you need to pursue is one with God, because that's your initial purpose. You exist to enjoy and live life with your maker.

But it certainly doesn't end there. Because our good God is good indeed.

Genesis 2:18:

18 And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” 

2. God created relationships for us.

I find this passage very intriguing as it tells of the first relationship that God created. Instead of having men live alone, he created women for men. And all the men say... (Bless God!). Before the feminist opinions claw at me, I don't think that God created women just for men. (As in Genesis 1, He had a plan to create both men AND women). However, I do think that God created women as a gift for men. And it's a beautiful thing. Women, you're beautiful. As you are. Not just to men, for men or whatever, but you are good because God made you and He thinks you're good. How do I know? It says so in Genesis 1:31 "Then God saw everything that He had made, and indeed it was very good...".

Now this is the bonus part, and how I see God's hand over relationships.

Genesis 2:21:

21 And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. 22 Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man.

"He brought her to the man" I just love this phrase. I apply this to my current viewpoint of dating and relationships as this; I envision both a man and woman living their respective lives. God knows the right time to bring two people together. God knows our individual needs. And God has the best plans for us. I can't help but smile at the fact that God placed Eve where Adam was, just as how I believe that God will place me where my future husband will be at. So ladies, trust in God that He will move you at the right time. You just need to be you. It's really interesting because according to a Harvard study, married men are healthier than men who were never married... and men who are married also live longer than men without spouses. But women, married or single, it doesn't affect their health or longevity. It's funny to see how that aligns with scripture because God did say that it is not good for man to be alone, but He did not state that it is not good for women to be alone! So ladies, it's allgood if you're single or in a relationship - because either way you're good. It's men that should worry, haha kidding. Seriously though, #lifehack literally.

Now this is for the men. Proverbs 18:22 states that "He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD." To be able to find something means that it has to exist in the first place. Don't worry, God's got you! He doesn't only custom-make a lady for you to bless you, but He also delivers her to you. "He brought her to the man" applies to you as well. God made your job easier by placing her in your proximity! Now let's learn from the alpha male -literally, the first male on Earth, what he does the moment God places her in his life...

23 And Adam said:
“This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh;

She shall be called Woman,

Because she was taken out of Man.”

What's the first thing Adam does? 'Adam said'. Adam said something first = Adam made the first move = Men should always pursue first. Just in case you missed Proverbs 18:22, "He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord". I'm sure it states 'he' not 'she'. All teasing aside, I'm really fascinated at this observation I had as I was reading Genesis. I love how God reveals to me little things, it's truly mind-blowing for me. I did not expect to receive so much from Genesis 1 and 2 about relationships, but as I was writing this post and reading the word, it really spoke to me.
To conclude, this post was initially inspired by the passage: Revelations 2:2-4

“I know your works, your labor, your patience, and that you cannot bear those who are evil. And you have tested those who say they are apostles and are not, and have found them liars; and you have persevered and have patience, and have labored for My name’s sake and have not become weary. Nevertheless I have this against you, that you have left your first love.

Genesis is the first book of the bible that marks the beginning of creation. Revelation is the last book of the bible that is prophetic and (some are) yet to come.

I write this to remind those who have forgotten their first love, which is God. He is the relationship we need before any other relationships. I believe it's not just to have a healthy, stable and complete relationship with others that we need God, but it's because our first purpose is to have a relationship with Him. Above all, aside from your titles as a leader, a friend, a boyfriend, a girlfriend, a husband, a wife, a whoever - you were called to be a child of God. God loves you and wants a relationship with you. You just need to respond to him wherever you are in whatever season. He loves you, always had and always will.

Love always,
Chelsea x


  1. Relationships aren't exactly my favorite or most passionate topic haha but I love seeing writings and musings on theology, I look forward to the rest of the series, don't stop writing!

    The only question I would ask is where does your understanding or perspectives give room for men who do not end up pursuing a woman or head to a married life (choosing to remain single or live a celibate life) Although I suspect this will probably be covered in one of your future blog posts...

    Also most would say that Genesis 1 and 2 were accounts of the same creation story, but Genesis 2 was a more detailed account of the 6th day of creation. So how God made Adam and Eve from dust is explained in greater detail in Genesis 2, but I don't think this actually has any bearing on your main points, but would probably suggest that they are not separate accounts i.e. God created the bodies and "identities" of Adam and Eve at the same time

    Looking forward to more!

    1. Hey there! Thank you for the encouragement :) It's funny because I would consider myself a very relational person in terms of my relationship and understanding with/of God, but awhile ago, I was challenged in my faith to grow in theology. I had a revelation of how God is both relational and is the essence of theology, thus, a healthy balance would be to be both relational and theological. I find that many women are mainly feelers, thus they focus on how God makes them feel in their walk with God; but not just women, I think there are many Christians who base their faith on what they feel or how God has made them feel. While that isn't wrong, it is necessary to also have an understanding of who God is. And as I mentioned earlier on about being challenged in my faith regarding theology, I find that men seem to be more logical and require actual explanations on how and why God does exist, rather than being interested in solely feelings and how God works relationally. However, I'll end here because my rant can go on forever! haha.

      Regarding celibacy, I am not a male and do not have the gift of celibacy, so I don't think I will be able to write in a perspective that benefits males who are called to celibacy. I have probably close to 0 knowledge in this topic. Having said that, I would consider these questions for someone who isn't sure if they have the gift of celibacy:

      1. Have I and do I feel emotionally attracted to the opposite sex?
      2. Have I and do I feel physically/sexually attracted to the opposite sex?
      3. Why am I considering celibacy?
      4. Has God called me to celibacy? By this I mean directly and clearly.

      If you haven't been emotionally attached in the past, or do not feel sexually attracted to others, it doesn't necessarily mean you're called to celibacy. Sometimes it takes time for people to fall in love, or even be interested, especially with the right one. I also don't think that just because one is content with singleness in the season they're in directly concludes that they are called to celibacy. Thus, I think the intention of why you are choosing celibacy is important to note and be aware of. If God has directly called you to celibacy clearly, then I would assume that He will enable you and guide you. Either way, I am sure that He is able to lead you in the direction He intends for you to go if that is His will for you :)