Thursday, November 27, 2014

Why shouldn't I date guys who aren't in the same religion as me?


*This post is solely my personal conviction and opinion, you may think otherwise.
So if you feel like you'd be offended, I'd advise you to re-consider reading this.

So my sister was talking to a guy friend of hers who has another religion; they were on the topic of discussing their own views on why they would and wouldn't date certain people. Her friend interpreted that he wouldn't mind dating someone of a different religion, just as long as there's love or what not. My sister had lil trouble sharing why she believes that it is and should be important to be in a relationship with someone of the same 'religion' - but not putting out that christianity is a religion. (Because christianity isn't, and should be a relationship).

So when she has all these boom-mazing (boom + amazing) ideas and rants, but doesn't know how to phrase it and get to the point, she always asks me and irks me by saying

"Dear eloquence,"
(as some of you may know that my previous blog name was indeed dear-eloquence)

{ continuing }

"How do I tell my friend why I shouldn't date guys who don't follow the same religion as me?"

Here's my answer in a blog rant:

So indeed, in the bible, it states "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?" - 2 Corinthians 6:14

Pretty much it means we shouldn't marry people who have a different religion.
Now apart from being 'religious' by following the principles of the bible, let me interpret it from  personal experience & conviction.

Many christian girls (and guys) have said "I wouldn't date someone who's not a Christian.".
Or when I asked "what do you look for in a partner/future spouse/bf/gf?", in some replies, they will state "Oh! They have to be a Christian." or "Oh! They have to go to church."

And of course, I ask, "But why?"

"Why must they be a Christian? And Why must they go to church?"

Some responses state "Oh, because I go to church. So I'd like them to go to church with me." or "Cause the bible says so." or "Cause I'm not allowed to." and of course, "I don't know.".

So here's my answer to why I don't date guys who aren't in the same 'religion' as me, and why I don't just date Christian guys.

Sounds contradicting huh.

But let me give you a fact (or facts) about me.
I've dated guys who aren't Christians.
In fact, the guys I've dated were badasses and/or lukewarm.
I've never dated a guy who is Godly, or had spiritual connections to me.

But long gone is the old me.

When I broke up with my last boyfriend - wait, let me phrase this again.
When my last boyfriend and I broke up early last year, I changed.

I've been a Christian all my life. But like most of the majority, I was lukewarm in the fact that I knew the stories of the bible, I knew who God claimed to be, I went to church weekly, I even served in ministries, I knew the principles & theories, I prayed when I had difficulties & needs, I even prayed when I didn't need anything, I had a few encounters with God here and there during worships.. and that was pretty much all to it.

But after my last break up, I found God in a way like never before.
And it changed me. I didn't only do what I wrote earlier, but there was more to it.
My heart, mind, soul & spirit was involved.
God became a part of my life.
No, he wasn't just a part of my life.
God became my whole life.

In all that I do, I seek God in it.
I find him in situations when he didn't seem to be there.
I wanted him in everything.
My work, my study, my worship, my relationships, my friendships, my family, me...

In a simple answer,
I don't date guys who aren't in the same religion as me & why I don't just date Christian guys is because my life = God // God = my life.
How am I supposed to be committed, one, or share my life with someone who doesn't do the same?

How can I love someone intimately & make them part of my life when they don't see the focal point of what I see in everything?

That's why.
Because now, I expect to get into a relationship not seeing and abiding in the love we have for each other. No, I see me in a relationship with someone I am completely head over heels for because he is so madly in love with the same thing I am. He's absolutely in love with the same person - Jesus.

And that's why.

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